Sometimes I feel pretty selfish for thinking about my future, to get a good job, get a degree. I know its not to a point, but why do we worry so much about our future that it consumes our thoughts and dont give a second thought to the Kingdom? Thats what we should be working towards instead of a successful future. We work towards the Kingdom of God because that is our ultimate end and new beginning. Sometimes a successful future is granted to us, its a blessing if that is what is in Gods will for us, if its not we have to be just as thankful.
Sometimes I feel like I am going to have this really cool future, get a cool job and be alright, just alright. Other times I feel like I am going to be working in a coffee shop for the rest of my life wondering where I went wrong and struggling from paycheck to paycheck like now. With the amount of debt that is collected when going to school, it almost seems impossible to get yourself out of the quicksand. It makes you wonder if its worth it. Should I even give school, a degree another thought? How can I afford this?
I am only 20, 20! How in the world am I so young? And how in the world am I in so much debt already? And why does it surprise me every time I think of my age? I have so much more life to live, I have so many more experiences and adventures and struggles and tears. I know I am not done here. And I know that God provides ways for us, but I just feel like I am stuck in this quicksand.
Maybe this is too personal, but hey, life is personal. Get over it.
Heather Joy,
ReplyDeleteYou are wonderful, just letting you know. I'm so inspired by your love of life and the way you are chasing after it, doing something that has always been a passion for you while doing God's work. He uses us in ways we can't fathom . I know how you feel about thinking about the future, sometimes I feel ike it comsumes me as well. I many times have to think and almost yell at myself that 20 isnt everything, that we have so mucnh more to look forward to and God has our footsteps so readily mapped out for us. I know someday that waht ever God has you doing, you will love it and glorify him with it! I'm going to link you a blog that I found when I googled something about God and life after reading your blog. lol. I miss you, and keep enjoying yourself and doing good work! Also, wehen you get home we are going to do a series on this new book by Lisa Bevere, and I think you will love uit so I am waiting for you to get home to do it haha. may the grace of God be always with you :)
http://www.crosswalk.com/faith/women/trusting-in-gods-plan-11554577.html
Dear Heather....just read your middle name in the previous post...Joy! Of course! You are a joy! ..such a fitting name ;)...
ReplyDeleteYou may think you are in quicksand...but to me you are in a better place then most girls your age....only 20!? You are an amazing girl! and a blessing to God's kingdom! ;) He will pull you out of all your quicksand moments ;)Love, Aunt Jo