Childhood dreamin.

This past week has been an absolute whirl wind. Working Monday to Saturday does that to you, plus getting home just in time to sleep-to get up and do it all over again. I do believe that I am outdoing myself... but I cant say that I dont enjoy being busy.

I have been pretty reminiscent lately, or maybe just today. The old tree at my grandparents place was cut down in a matter of minutes. That tree had been there since my mom was even a child, and I grew up seeing that tree everyday. We always attempted to climb it as little kids, but grandmas pinches stung too bad. You know, the ones on the fleshy part of the back of your arm that KILL. The ones I always got with a quick swat on the toosh because I always seemed to look for trouble. Seeing that tree cut up and sectioned in their yard just seemed like I was looking at my childhood. I realized today that I no longer feel childish, or that childish character I wanted to cling to for so long. I feel content in my skin, with that tree, with its long old branches seemed to contain all these odd ball memories and I finally just let go. Not that I am letting go of my childhood- cause lets face it, I was a pretty cool kid. But that persona, I am a 21 year old woman- yes, I can say woman now because I actually FEEL it. Age doesnt matter- you can be 30 and still act like a girl (sorry, Ive seen it) as long as you feel like a woman instead of a flimsy girl, you are a woman.

Also, the thing that reminded me of my Grandma again was when I was sick of my CD so I turned on the radio and was flipping through the channels and I hit the Classical music radio. I was instantly back in my Grandparents van, I can hear my Grandmas voice, smell the interior of the van, and feel incredibly bored all at the same time. I just sat in my car with a ridiculous grin on my face because now I love classical music, and the fact that something like that can send you back 14, 15 years. My view of my Grandparents has changed. I used to think of my Grandparents as the people you love, and you have to love and respect them... But when you grow up and start looking at them as people instead of your grandparents... You get a totally different view of them. You see them as a flawed human being as you are... and still love them for it. If my Grandpa Buitenbos was younger, Id totally want to marry him. Most want to marry their father, I want to marry my Grandpa. He is the kindest man I have ever met, when I see him he never fails to take my face in his big hands and tell me how proud he is of me, and how beautiful I have grown up to be. I just cant explain enough the huge respect I have for my grandparents. That being said, its already almost 1am, and I promised myself id slow down this week but I almost dont think thats going to happen. So, thats my brain vomit for the day.